FAQ: But doesn’t evidence show that women are just as likely to batter their partners as men?

A: No. This is an often repeated claim based on either faulty understanding or outright misrepresentation of a few studies made using the CONFLICT TACTICS SCALE (CTS) or similar self-report surveys. One of the authors of the original study, Richard Gelles, categorically rejects this interpretation of his research, and has done ever since these factoids began to be popularised.

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE FACTOIDS
by Richard J. Gelles, University of Rhode Island Family Violence Research Program

[Excerpt]
MYTH: WOMEN ARE AS VIOLENT AS ARE MEN, AND WOMEN INITIATE VIOLENCE AS OFTEN AS DO MEN.

“This factoid cites research by Murray Straus, Suzanne Steinmetz, and Richard Gelles, as well as a host of other self-report surveys. Those using this factoid tend to conveniently leave out the fact that Straus and his colleague’s surveys as well as data collected from the National Crime Victimization Survey (Bureau of Justice Statistics) consistently find that no matter what the rate of violence or who initiates the violence, women are 7 to 10 times more likely to be injured in acts of intimate violence than are men.”

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE: NOT AN EVEN PLAYING FIELD
By Richard J. Gelles

“[S]elf-described battered husbands, men’s rights group members and some scholars maintain that there are significant numbers of battered men, that battered men are indeed a social problem worthy of attention and that there are as many male victims of violence as female. The last claim is a significant distortion of well-grounded research data.

To even off the debate playing field it seems one piece of statistical evidence (that women and men hit one another in roughly equal numbers) is hauled out from my 1985 research – and distorted – to “prove” the position on violence against men. However, the critical rate of injury and homicide statistics provided in that same research are often eliminated altogether, or reduced to a parenthetical statement saying that “men typically do more damage.” The statement that men and women hit one another in roughly equal numbers is true, however, it cannot be made in a vacuum without the qualifiers that a) women are seriously injured at seven times the rate of men and b) that women are killed by partners at more than two times the rate of men.”

Feminism Friday: More on how Rape Jokes Just Aren’t Funny

Obviously, a lot of women feel uncomfortable about rape jokes because rape is an ever-present background threat to daily life for us, not just a bit of regrettable “bad sex”. Melissa McEwan at Shakesville has written quite a lot about how rape jokes bolster rape culture, and posted an excellent essay on the subject of rape jokes this week, and it highlighted a point I hadn’t especially considered, and which I wish I had considered: that rape jokes are Post-Traumatic Stress Triggers for those who have been raped.

Seriously? I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I will never understand why anyone wants to be the total douchebag who blindsides someone by evoking her (or his) memories of being raped, in the guise of “humor.”
[...]
Meanwhile, I added Patton Oswalt and Brian Posehn to my ever-growing list of comedians I don’t watch, because—silly me—I don’t like being slapped upside the head with rape jokes when I’m trying to have a good time.

Quite honestly, it’s not even because I particularly find the jokes personally triggering anymore; I generally just find them pathetic and inexplicable. I’m more bothered by the fact that the jokes normalize and effectively minimize the severity of rape and thusly perpetuate the rape culture. And I’m bothered by the thought of a woman who’s recently been raped, who’s just experienced what may be the worst thing that will ever happen to her, and turns on the telly to watch her favorite comedian and have a much-needed laugh—only to hear him using that horrible, life-changing thing as the butt of a joke. About cologne. Or a bad movie. For fuck’s sake.

I still don’t understand—and I don’t believe I ever will—why anyone wants to be the guy who sends that shiver down her spine, who makes her eyes burn hot with tears at an unwanted memory while everyone laughs and laughs.

Still. Not. Funny.

Feminism Friday Round-Up

As usual, not all of these posts have actually been tagged as Feminism Friday articles by their authors, but if a post appears to fit into the category I include it. Please add any other online articles you think fit the bill from the last few weeks in comments.

Amanda Marcotte is out of the gate early this week with this fabulous post: On pigs, basketball, frames, and music

I’d say the two major metaphorical frames about sex would be the conservative-sexist one and the liberal-feminist one. The conservative-sexist metaphorical framework of sex is Sex As Conquest. In this frame, women’s bodies are objects and sex is about the struggle to conquer the pussy. Sometimes the struggle over the pussy is between men (ex: jokes about fathers guarding their daughters’ bodies from young male interlopers) and sometimes women themselves are tasked with defending the pussy from sex. If sexual intercourse happens, by definition, the man who gets to fuck the woman has won and the defender (father or woman herself) has lost. Sex happens when women surrender, in this model.

The liberal-feminist view of sex is that it’s not a war or a game, but more of a mutual collaboration, less like a battle and more like playing music. In this model, to be a sexual person is to be a musician and sex is playing your instrument. Sometimes you play by yourself, sometimes you get with others and jam, and sometimes you actually have a band that you have a long-term relationship with. There aren’t winners and losers, but there can be good and bad sex, just like there can be good and bad music. The collaboration model of sex explains why acceptance of homosexuality and kinkiness are generally liberal views. It makes no more sense to call homosexuality immoral than it does to posit that rock is more moral than jazz; it’s all a matter of taste. Homosexuality creates a lot of grief to those who have a fairly strict conservative view of sex because you can’t even tell who’s supposed to be the offense and the defense. It’s simply outside of their model, and it creates cognitive dissonance, which often makes the person suffering it want to wipe out the source of the dissonance.

These separate models of what sex is explain why threads about rape turn into hellholes pretty quickly—sexists and feminists aren’t even speaking the same language, in a sense.

Thinking Girl has posted excerpts from a thesis by Shannon called the Domestic Goddess Series over the last few weeks:
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

A recent addition to the ranks of Feminism Friday bloggers, elorie at Same As A Wildcat has been writing on-topic essays for the last few weeks – here’s her Feminism Friday archive.

Bluemilk takes on Sex and Breastfeeding.

Lauredhel looks at Feminist Ethics and Digital Communities.

Blog Carnivals Reminder

Blog Carnivals are regular collections of links to blog posts discussing a particular theme, usually limited to recent articles within the intervals between sessions of the Carnival. I’ve got links to the homepages of various feminist and feminist friendly carnivals in the Links section, but here’s a reminder of who’s hosting current sessions of the Carnivals. If searching for any blog carnival on any area of interest (chainsaw jugglers probably have one by now), you can always find details of hosts, submission deadlines and submission addresses at the Blog Carnival site.

24th Carnival Against Sexual Violence (fortnightly): Abyss2Hope (1st anniversary edition!)
38th Carnival of Feminists (monthly): Team Rainbow (39th: Laurelin in the Rain due June 6th up now)
2nd Carnival of Radical Feminists (monthly): Feminist Law Professors
7th Scientiae: women in science, engineering, technology and math (fortnightly): FemaleCSGradStudent
14th Feminist SF Carnival (monthly): Heroine Content (15th will be at Feminist SciFi – The Blog!)
Carnival of Bent Attractions (monthly-ish): TransAdvocate